DOMESTIC VIOLENCE AS A WHOLE

At some point in time, we have all experienced a feeling of loneliness. For some, loneliness can be too much to bear. When we become lonely we start to replay memories of the past and we start to feel sad. Sometimes loneliness can also lead to depression. This post is not just for those who have experienced or witnessed domestic violence, this post is for everyone. I wrote this post to encourage you because I too have experienced loneliness, but I believe that we can use our feelings of loneliness to lead us to greatness. Look at this quote below by Mr. Yousuf Karsh. I believe what He says is so true. I believe that God uses loneliness to get us closer to Him, He uses loneliness to speak to us. Sometimes you need to be alone in order to think clearly. I know for me personally, I have prefer to be alone when I am working. It gives me time to focus and to relax. How can you fully create in a environment full of noise?       I would like to share another quote with you,

Yesterday, I was really thinking about some things, especially when it comes to relationships.I was thinking about how some relationships that we enter really bring us down and what we thought was love was really lust. Below is a tweet that I tweeted from my organizations account yesterday. Real love will make you better not worse — F.A.C.E. I.T. (@FACEITORG) January 1, 2014 You see, sometimes we just enter relationships that we were never meant to be in, but they also teach us a lesson. If ever you get into a relationship where you are constantly losing out on who you are then that is not the relationship for me. I find most times though that there was already some sort of insecurity that we already had that opened us to wanting to be in that particular relationship. It is important that we come to learn what true love really is. It is so easy for someone to throw the love word around without putting any meaning to it. Love is a verb, not just an emotion. Love is not just som

Before I get started on the subject for today's blog, I first want to thank all of my readers. You all are my inspiration. Thank you for always reading, commenting, and sharing. I believe that it is because of you that this blog was chosen and listed as one of the  Top 101 domestic violence resources on Social Work Degree.Net . I cannot tell you how much that meant to me especially to be among the top domestic violence organizations and sites that even I look up too. I haven't written in a while so I did want to update you on that and again to say thank you. Now, for the subject of today's post. I have been thinking about this topic a lot lately and it was really on my heart this morning. It is amazing to me how many excuses that I hear and read when it comes to the subject of domestic violence. So many times I read and hear that women and/or men deserved to be hit. Although we should not provoke one another to anger, violence is simply NOT the answer. Just because

Grassroots non-for-profit, A New Me Foundation, Inc. seeks to empower women with a real talk forum hosted by Comedienne Buff Bay during Domestic Violence Awareness Month. CHICAGO, September 23,2013--A New Me Foundation, Inc. presents "Real Talk Relationship Forum" hosted by Comedienne Rashida "Buff Bay" Lucas. Comedienne "Buff Bay" has been seen on Divorce Court, R & B Divas of Atlanta, Jokes n Notes, and the Laugh Factory. The forum is Saturday October 26, 2013 from 8:00pm-11:00pm at the Epic Luxury Boutique Chicago, IL. The forum serves as a fundraiser for A New Me Foundation, Inc. to continue to provide FREE services to victims, survivors, and their families who are affected by domestic violence. The event will include raffle prizes, refreshments, cocktails, and entertainment. A New Me Foundation invites everyone to come for an opportunity to enjoy an atmosphere of fun and empowerment. A New Me Foundation, Inc. will host this forum during th

Hello Readers and Fellow Advocates, Today, I have another Guest Post. I am excited about this one and this is a topic that is dear to me but that I have not written about here.  Melissa actually takes a turn with this one because she is not talking about the batterers and alcoholism but rather how the person that is being abused uses alcoholism as a coping mechanism. This guest post comes from Mrs. Melissa Kluska. Here is a little about Melissa: Melissa currently writes for organizations such as St Jude Retreats, an alternative solution to traditional alcohol and drug rehab. As well as writing for St. Jude’s, Melissa also enjoys writing pieces that will help others on topics like health and relationships. 2 million. The amount of injuries associated with domestic violence each year, and 84% of these domestic violence victims are women . [1] Some victims of domestic abuse have stayed in an abusive relationship for years while others have been close to n

In honor of Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month, I am giving the Kindle edition of my book " Because He Said He Loved Me: A short story about teen dating violence " away for free today. The reason being is because there is a message in this story that I want to get out to teens and there is even a message for adults. The teen years are the most prevalent years, it is when teens first start dating. For most teens, this is the time when they first experience feelings of love, when they first feel that they are cared for by the opposite sex. These are also some of the hardest times for teens. Teens experience so many changes and it when it comes to relationships a lot of what they experience will be new to them and they may think it is normal. Here are some statistics on Teen Dating Violence Via LoveisRespect.org Nearly 1.5 million high school students nationwide experience physical abuse from a dating partner in a single year. One in three adolescents in the U.S. is

A Message To My Readers:  Dear readers and supporters, I wanted to take out the time to thank you all for following my blog, commenting, sharing, and being so encouraging all the time. It really means a lot to me and I pray that I have inspired, encouraging, and helped some of you in many ways. Today I have decided to have a guest blogger, this is the first time since I have started this blog that I've ever had a guest blogger. This young lady at 19 years old has inspired me and I wanted to allow her to use this platform in order to inspire you as well. Miss Jeanine Strother entered a film contest and decided to do a documentary about domestic violence. It  touched my heart to see her at young age raising awareness for a cause that is very close to my heart and I am sure all of her hearts. Jeanine did not get picked in the final round but she is still eligible to win in another contest. On behalf of Jeanine I would like to ask you all to please watch the documentary and share it

I wake up to the sound of him walking around the room. I assume that something is going to happen soon. He could get hit me, he could curse me; he could seriously hurt me if he dares. He drags me out the bed and out the room. My heart is hurting, my mind is pounding, and I’ve got to get out of here soon. He begins to attempt to sedate me so that he can rape me But I noticed that silence fills the room. Do I not have any cry in me left or have I lost my voice? I’m tired of screaming and shouting only for my cries to go unnoticed. Only for my tears to just dry up while I’m being ignored but being silent keeps me in a prison. I have no one to turn too but I also haven’t really turned to anyone Because every time someone gets close to me, I allow the threats of this fool to disturb my cool. So I’m no longer cool, instead I’m warm feeling unloved and torn apart. As he attempts to rape me I think to myself, dare I be silent? Or should I dare to make a noise

Many of you might remember me writing a post about why I started the NFL Domestic Violence petition . Well, this time I am going to talk about athletes and domestic violence and eventually will elaborate again on why I chose to start with the NFL. Notice that I said start with, so that means I am open to petition other sports organizations but I chose to start with the NFL. Now, the NFL is the number ONE sport in the United States and ranks number 10 in the world. Now that is huge. There are so many people who enjoy and love the sport of football. Now, yes every sport has players that have been involved in domestic violence incidents. In recent news, we have heard about soccer player Hope Solo and her husband Jerramy Stevens  (Former NFL Player), we have heard about Dez Bryant and Chad Johnson ( Formally known as Ocho Cinco) but I cannot help but to point out the fact that majority of the time when you hear about domestic violence as it pertains to athletes, it comes more fro

 In recent news, there is a story that is being reported that has left a lot of people wondering and nobody seems to have answers but maybe there are some answers. American Soccer player and Olympic Gold Medalist Hope Solo were reported to have been in a domestic dispute a couple of days ago. Although, Hope chose not to speak on it or even press charges, the police still arrested her then fiancé Jerramy Stevens ( A Former NFL player). The incident was said to happen at a party and the police felt like they had enough reason/evidence to arrest Mr. Stevens. What happened after that though, is what now has a lot of people wondering. It was said that Hope Solo refused to talk to the police and warned nobody else to talk to them as well-Let me be the first to say this is a sign that Hope is probably in an abusive relationship. See when it comes to domestic violence, the answers are not always clear but when one educates themselves on the subject, then the answers become a little clea

One of my favorite sayings and one that I came up with myself is "As advocates we should seek to understand more than we seek to be understood".  As a new and aspiring advocate I do not want to assume or come off as thinking that I know everything there is to know about domestic violence or any other causes for that matter.  I see statistics all the time, but I am not really big on statistics. I am big on testimonies and learning about other peoples struggle and how they overcame. Because of that, I have created a survey in order to understand better the emotional affects of domestic violence. I would like to hear from you, if you would like to share. Let it be known that I do not want to turn this into statistics that is not what this is about, I just want to hear from people who have actually been through it.  I have been through it myself, but in the process of wanting to help others, I also want to understand them. I realize that every situation is different and handl

As advocates, survivors, people of faith, or just people who want change period, there is only so much that we can do but we cannot do it alone. Prayer is the key because faith without work is dead and vice versa. We have to intercede for those are going through a crisis. As we know this month (October) is National Breast Cancer, Bullying, and Awareness month, I would like to ask you all to join me in prayer every night this month at 9pm CT or whenever you can but preferably at night. Why at night? I believe that at night, as we wind down and have time to think, that is when our thoughts most consume us. Night Time is also the most loneliest and scariest for some. Let us be intercessors not only this month but period. I created this event on Evite ( Prayer for Those in Crisis ) feel free to let us know if you will be joining us in prayer. God Bless you all, Nicole Lofton (@NicoleCherese) on Twitter Founder of F.A.C.E. I.T. (@faceitorg) on Twitter

In Honor of Domestic Violence Awareness Month, I wanted to take the time out as a survivor to give back to those who still may be going through a domestic abuse situation or just an unhealthy relationship or situation period. While I do not have money to give, etc one thing I do have is faith, prayer, and HOPE. Because it is Domestic Violence Awareness Month, I wanted to speak to the victims of Domestic Violence. Some times this is the hardest to do, but it is time for us as survivors and advocates to really speak from our hearts to the victims hearts. We don't need to be judgmental because we need to come from that place of understanding, if fact, we do come from that place of understanding because we KNOW and UNDERSTAND what they have went through because WE went through it too. We must not forget, we have to remember how we felt when we were going through it in order to TRY to understand what they are feeling, in order to try to understand why they haven't left yet, in or

Many of you may have or may not have noticed a petition going around that says something like " Let's get the NFL to wear purple in honor of Domestic Violence " I would like to take some time out to explain a little more about the petition. As some of you may know my name is Nicole Lofton and I am the founder of Faithful Deeds Foundation  I am also the creator of the NFL Domestic Violence petition . I realize that there as been some talk about whether this petition was the right thing to do, some people say that I am leaving out all the other sports league that may have players that have been involved in Domestic Violence incidents, some say that the NFL is not important when it comes to Domestic Violence, some say that my argument is not valid and well some say that it is simply just a waste of time.  Well, today I am here to address and respond to those concerns. You see first and foremost, I would like to make the statement that this petition is NOT a