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Thursday, October 20, 2011

BREAK THE STEREOTYPES-BREAK THE SILENCE-END THE VIOLENCE

This blog may not come off as "agreeable" to everyone and that's okay. I am an advocate that wholeheartedly believe that we not cannot fully combat/tackle Domestic Violence as a WHOLE unless we recognize, accept, and acknowledge that Domestic Violence happens to both men and women. I read so many news articles, statistics, etc that are in favor of women and leave the men hanging. I suppose that as a woman such as myself, it would be easier for me to advocate for women and relate to them because in fact I am a woman but do we always need to take the easy route? When I think about Domestic Violence Advocates, I think that God has hand picked and designed us to be just that, so its not about us, its about Him. I started to think what if a male victim of domestic violence was reading things that I wrote or listening to things I said and what IF I was only talking about women and the statistic of women, how might that discourage them for coming to speak to me or share their story with me and vice versa. Men should advocate for women as well.

Don't get me wrong, I definitely know that domestic violence is not easy to talk about period but the truth of the matter is that women are more likely to speak out than men are. Why is that? Why aren't men speaking up and speaking out? There is a reason and I am not saying that I know the reason but as advocates we have to think about things like that, maybe the same reasons that LBGT are not speaking out about domestic violence but that is a whole different story, that's another blog. We have to stop being so bias when it comes to the issues of our COMMUNITIES.

I am not trying to get you to understand me at all because my motto is "As advocates we must seek to understand more than we seek to be understood" which actually spins off a verse in the Bible, but it came to me one day and I held on to that. So right now I'm seeking to understand and trying to encourage others to seek to understand as well. One thing that I am trying to get to be understood is that in order to tackle domestic violence as a whole we have to reach out to men and women. If we work together, we can make a difference. Just think even in marriage.. GOD said it is not good for man to be alone so i will create for Him a helper(the woman) so that means that men and women need each other NOT saying that we should be NEEDY or dependent. What I am saying is what if you are a woman who strictly advocates for women and vice versa for men? What if women, God wanted to use you to reach a man? Men,  what if God wanted you to reach a woman? Ask yourself how would you do it? Sometimes we block blessings and miss opportunities for a variety of reasons. I for one, use to always say that I had a passion for women and children, I could relate to women because I am a women. I use to say I wanted a daughter first, then guess what? GOD gave me a son as my first child and my only child as of right now. I started to take a step back and look at how God did and was in fact using me to reach men and talk to them about Him and that opened my eyes so now that I am becoming an advocate for domestic violence, I have a passion for women, men, and children. I have a passion for the FAMILY, I have a passion for the PEOPLE.

One other thing, I am not trying to take away from statistics, statistics are good in certain circumstances but you have to look at how these statistics were developed and WHO developed them, it is important that we look at those and do our own research. The truth about statistic is that numbers CHANGE daily. I say that to say this..DOMESTIC VIOLENCE CAN AND DOES HAPPEN TO ANYMORE, IT DOES NOT MATTER WHAT GENDER IT HAPPENS TO MOST, WHAT MATTERS IS THAT IT IS HAPPENING PERIOD AND THIS IS A HUGE PROBLEM.

Sometimes we get in Gods way, I want to courage everyone to truly seek God and put our past and mindsets away and let God use us, im not saying that He wants to use you in the way I have explain but maybe he wants to use you in a different way that you dont know about yet.

DOMESTIC VIOLENCE IS A RAPIDLY GROWING EPIDEMIC THAT HAS CAUSED MANY TO SUFFER. MANY ARE SUFFERING IN SILENCE, MANY HAVE CHOSEN TO TAKE THEIR OWN LIVES, MANY ARE WITHOUT A PLACE TO STAY, MANY HAVE DIED AT THE HANDS OF ANOTHER, MANY ARE DEPRESSED, MANY ARE TRYING TO FIND THEMSELVES. IF WE COME OUT OF THE STEREOTYPES WE CAN BE SURE TO MAKE A BIGGER DIFFERENCE, SOMETHING HAS TO BE DONE. MY HEART GOES OUT TO ALL VICTIMS, SUFFERS, FAMILIES AND ADVOCATES. MY GOD CONTINUE TO RESTORE YOU, GIVE YOU HOPE, STRENGTH, WISDOM, MAY HE CONTINUE TO CARRY YOUR BURDENS AND HELP YOU RELEASE THEM. MAY HE CREATE IN YOU A HEART, MIND AND SOUL. MAY HE CONTINUE TO KEEP YOU, USE YOU AND BLESS YOU.

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