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Friday, January 10, 2014

Sometimes, You Have To Learn To Just Let Go.

Have you ever wanted something so bad and once you got it, it was nothing like what you thought it would be? Furthermore, after you figured out that it was not what you thought, you still tried to hold on to it? Well, you are not alone, because I have too. One thing that I have learned and I am still learning is that sometimes you just have to learn to let it go. You see sometimes we try to mold and fix situations and people into what we want them/it to be even when we see it is not working. The end result is that it is hurts us because either we refuse to let go or we hold on to it for too long.

Just like some relationships, we see they are not working, but we hold on. Now, some relationships are good to hold on too, because relationships take time. How much time is up for you to decide though. If you are compromising too much of yourself, it will take a toil on you. We hold on to relationships for different reasons. Sometimes we actually believe they will work, sometimes we just can't stand the fact of them not working, sometimes we are trying to fill a void of loneliness, and sometimes we just want it to work. It is possible to get lost in a relationship and also lose time that you cannot get back. I believe deep down when know we something is not going to work and the longer we hold on, the more we damage ourselves emotionally.

Now, this doesn't just happen in relationships, this happens with familyships ( yes, I made that up), friendships, and it even happens in the workplace.  Sometimes we have to distance ourselves from friends and family. I often find that people struggle more with distancing themselves from family due to the saying "blood is thicker than water", which in most cases is not true. You see because I have a different definition of blood that extends beyond family. I also have to consider my brothers and sisters in Christ,I also know that God says that will be a friend that sticks closer than a brother. Sometimes family will turn on you quicker than anybody. You can love from a distance though, while still praying for them. It doesn't mean that you and that family member cannot be close again. There is a time, a season, and a reason for everything. Elevation requires separation.

Finally, yes sometimes we hold on to our jobs/careers too long. When you get to a point where you are no longer happy, when you are being treated unfairly, when you are not making enough money to take care of your family, it could be a sign to move on. I don't mean just up and quit(although some do), you can still be on the job search while keeping your current job. Sometimes people are scared to search for other places of employment because they feel they are not qualified or it won't be the same. If that is you, I have some news for you: God qualifies those that he called and you can be assured that He has called you as well as qualified you.

Another suggestion is to discover your passion, that could make your current job easier to deal with. What do you really aspire to do? How can you do it? Why aren't you doing it? Just somethings to think about. In reality though, we(including myself), really do need to learn how to let go. Some people and things do have a time limit in ourselves, lets not let that time exceed its limit.

God bless,

Nicole Lofton