DOMESTIC VIOLENCE AS A WHOLE

Dear Survivor, I hope this message finds you at the right time in your life. It's been a while since I have wrote on this blog, but I am always grateful for all of you who still read and keep up with this particular blog. I have a very important message on my heart. It is one that God has placed on my heart this week and that message is that it is time to heal. This is only goes for you, but it  goes for me as well. It is time for us to heal and allow ourselves to be free to be ourselves again as well as to love and be loved. Now I know some people may feel like they have already healed. I felt that way too, but sometimes we are only temporarily or half way healed. The moment that we keep replaying our situation and it brings us down instead of uplifting us, that is a sign that we are not yet healed. The moment when we try to begin a new relationship or endeavor, but the memories of the past begin to haunt us and hold us back, then we are not healed yet. The moment we fee...

Dear Survivor, Has anyone ever told you thank you for surviving? If not, then I would like to be the first person to tell you, so here it goes: THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH FOR SURVIVING! Now, some may be wondering, why I decided to say that or what that really means. What it means is that, surviving domestic violence is more than just leaving or escaping an unhealthy relationship, because even after you do that, you still have to SURVIVE. A lot of people do not understand what domestic violence survivors go through on a daily basis, they have to fight emotions, block out negative thoughts, maybe even tune out negative people, they have to learn to love themselves again, they have to learn to believe in themselves again, they have to believe they are are worth living, they have to learn to trust again and most importantly they have to HEAL! Surviving is not something that happens overnight, surviving is something that you do everyday, so from one survivor to another, I just really wanted...

I hope that this post does not causes an uproar, but this is something that really needs to be discussed. I am not here to pass judgment in anyway, I am just simply here to state my opinion, explore a topic, and to start a discussion. There is something that has been troubling me lately and that something is the number of recent cases of children being killed under court-order supervision. I start to wonder how does that happen? Then I started to think about domestic violence and the laws in general. You see the law makers want us to uphold these laws and follow through, but they do not enforce the laws. It seems that LAW ENFORCEMENT has slowly disappeared. This is not to say that this is the case for everyone, but it is the case for most. The law tells those who are experiencing domestic violence to leave and get a restraining order. The restraining order is suppose to mean that the abuser cannot come near them, they also tell the person who is being abused not to have any contact...

Yesterday, something amazing happened. Before I continue on with that I want to again say a huge THANK YOU to all my readers, you are the reason why I continue to write. The best thing about blogging is one never really knows who is reading and what will come from it. I started this blog because I was encouraged to start blogging. The only subject that I could think of (at first) was domestic violence and I am so glad that I did it! Anyway, back to yesterday. I received a comment on my blog from Goldy Knows . For those who do not know, Goldy knows is a pro-wrestling personality, a motivational speaker, a singer, as well as a host of other things. Goldy is really big on Charity and now has her own reality show. In the comment that Goldy left, there was link to her show and on this particular show she interviewed a domestic violence survivor named Mary. I love to help and work with anybody who is supporting this cause, In fact, I love to help and support any cause, because yo...

I thought about sharing a quote and maybe I will, who knows? I am just free-styling this post right now, but this was on my heart. A lot of times when we are struggling, we tend to think that it's a bad thing and although I know that it feels like it, struggling is actually a good thing. Like Frederick Douglas said and I quote "No struggle, no progress".  Being a Domestic Violence Advocate or really just an advocate in general and a Christian Life Coach, my view on many issues has changed. I have learned to view the most negative things in a more positive way in order to stay encouraged and it works. I mean truly if everything was going the way that we wanted it too and nothing ever went wrong, what would we really learn from that? All we would learn is that we can have everything that we want, how we want it, and when we want it. We would also learned that we do not have to earn or work from anything. Just like a spoiled child, they get everything they want and if they...

Yesterday, I was really thinking about some things, especially when it comes to relationships.I was thinking about how some relationships that we enter really bring us down and what we thought was love was really lust. Below is a tweet that I tweeted from my organizations account yesterday. Real love will make you better not worse — F.A.C.E. I.T. (@FACEITORG) January 1, 2014 You see, sometimes we just enter relationships that we were never meant to be in, but they also teach us a lesson. If ever you get into a relationship where you are constantly losing out on who you are then that is not the relationship for me. I find most times though that there was already some sort of insecurity that we already had that opened us to wanting to be in that particular relationship. It is important that we come to learn what true love really is. It is so easy for someone to throw the love word around without putting any meaning to it. Love is a verb, not just an emotion. Love is not just som...

In honor of Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month, I am giving the Kindle edition of my book " Because He Said He Loved Me: A short story about teen dating violence " away for free today. The reason being is because there is a message in this story that I want to get out to teens and there is even a message for adults. The teen years are the most prevalent years, it is when teens first start dating. For most teens, this is the time when they first experience feelings of love, when they first feel that they are cared for by the opposite sex. These are also some of the hardest times for teens. Teens experience so many changes and it when it comes to relationships a lot of what they experience will be new to them and they may think it is normal. Here are some statistics on Teen Dating Violence Via LoveisRespect.org Nearly 1.5 million high school students nationwide experience physical abuse from a dating partner in a single year. One in three adolescents in the U.S. is ...

This particular blog post will kind of be all over the place, but it will slowly start to come together and eventually the reader will see why the title is "Domestic Violence: The Mark of Silence". As I sat here thinking, I started to wonder if teens being home alone a lot helped them hide domestic violence more than usual. During these times parents are at work a lot, times are hard, and in order to pay bills and eat, we have to go to work. I thought about how much time a teen or someone living with their parents would have time to cover up a bruise by the time their parents, guardian, or whoever they were living with got home. Pay attention to this closely, remember when you first got a hickey or someone you knew got one? Maybe you were a teenager, maybe you were an young adult, or even an adult. A lot of times when someone first gets a hickey, its kind of embarrasing to them. They find ways to hide it by covering it up with make up, wearing turtle necks, putting toothpas...